I make breakfast and some of my other meals in my apartment kitchen when I’m busy working on projects, like this journal. However, Jim and Peter are my best buddies here at Pine Needle Manor, and we meet for lunch and dinner in THE BIG NEEDLE dining room at least 5 days a week. These two guys know I’m gay and are very accepting unlike most of the evangelical and fundamentalist residents at PRICKLY MANOR. That’s another subject I’ve written about in the past. Anyway, we were eating lunch yesterday, and during the conversation I mentioned that I was thinking about making another trip to Florida this fall.

“Why would you want to do that,” they said in unison.

“Because I want to look for a place to live during the winter.”

“Why,” said Jim.

“Because it’s cold here.”

“But Isaac, remember how exhausted you were last year after your trip to Sarasota.”

“It was a good tired. I enjoyed myself.”

“But your family and all your friends are here,” Peter said.

“ Ruth and Samuel are here. All the other children and grandchildren have all moved away. You guys and Tillie are my only real friends here.”

“But you don’t know anyone there.”

“I’ll meet people. Perhaps I’ll even meet some gay and lesbian people.”

“Sh-h-h-h-h-h,” said Jim. “They’ll hear you.”

“So.”

“You know how crazed folks get around here when you talk about being gay.”

“Do I get upset when they talk about their assignations and liaisons?”

“There what?”

“Never mind.”

“I can’t imagine why anyone wouldn’t want to live right here in God’s country,” Peter said.

“First, as I’ve said before, everyone everywhere thinks they live in God’s favorite part of part of the universe. Second, God created Florida a lot warmer than he did Lancaster County. Instead of fussing and fuming, you guys should think about coming along with me”

“You know my heart won’t allow me to travel,” Peter said.
“My son would throw a fit,” said Jim.

“Why? He doesn’t bother to visit you anyway.”

“He worries about me.”

“Then why doesn’t he come to see you more often.”

“He would if he weren’t so busy with work.”

“At least Ruth visits me, though I wish she wouldn’t.”

“You don’t appreciate Ruth enough.”

“No. I don’t.”

And, so it went, round and round, spirals of conversation, spinning out of control, the same refrain, and the same laments as last week and the week before. It bores me to tears, and there’s another reason for me to think about leaving THE BIG NEEDLE. I like these guys, but we never talk about anything interesting. Sometimes I think they’re just sitting around waiting to die.

Florida waits. I will meet new friends there. I will know people who have lived their lives true to the way God created them, as gay and lesbian men and women.

Florida waits.

I can make Florida daydreams real!




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