November 29, 2004

Plan to Get Out-a Here


It’s over 2 weeks since my hernia surgery and I am starting to be able to stand up straight (well up-right) when I walk. I still am not allowed to do any exercise for 6 more weks. Bah, hum bug! I know I won’t be able to wait that long because my arthritis will take over, and I’ll be frozen in some horrible bent position for the rest of my life. Since I plan on living to at least one- hundred-and-five, I’ll be stuck facing dirt for 20 years or more. Instead of that dreadful situation, I’ve devised a 7-point plan for gaining my body back before I lose it. I’ll be out and about in my silver foil within a few weeks. I am not consulting the doctor because he will say that I shouldn’t do anything for the next 6 weeks. I won’t tell Ruth because she will throw a fit. Neither is acceptable.

Isaac’s 7 Point Plan

  1. (three weeks post surgery) I begin walking around the inside halls of my apartment complex here at THE BIG NEEDLE. I will do that 2 times per day.

  2. (four weeks post surgery) I extend my walks into the rest of the YE OLD NEEDLE complex, and I do that 2 times per day.

  3. Also, during the fourth week I begin doing various arm exercises with 5 pound weights. I will be careful. If my abdomen shows any signs of increased pain I will stop immediately.

  4. (five weeks post surgery) I am going back to the health club every other day. I will do slow stair climbing, and I will walk in the pool. I will begin to do some stretching. I will continue to do my arm exercises and walking at the STICKY NEEDLE.

  5. (six weeks post surgery) I will increase the rigor of my stair climbing and pool walking. I will increase the amount of stretching that I am doing. I will also increase my weights to 10 pounds. Since I will be taking more exercise at the health club, I will decrease the amount of walking I am doing here at THE MANOR.

  6. (seven weeks post surgery) I will continue stair climbing, pool walking, weight lifting and stretching. I will begin to do very basic upper abdominal sit-ups. Once again I will decrease the amount of walking I am doing here at THE MANOR.

  7. (eight weeks) I will continue with all of the above except that I will begin using the weight machines at the health club so that I can gradually increase the weight I am lifting. I will increase my stretches. I will begin swimming instead of just walking in the pool. I will increase my sit-ups. I will also increase the rigor of my stair climbing.

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